Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Teens and Divorce

It is estimated that 40-50% of marriages in America will end in Divorce or Separation. Parents often get wrapped up in the break up and dealing with messy situations that it impacts their ability to do a good job of parenting their children. Research shows that parental conflict during divorce impacts the development and self esteem of a child. Children are often put in the middle, having to choose between who's side to take which can be detrimental to their well-being and is very distressing to them. Children feel sadness, fear and guilt by being in the middle of parents who are arguing. Teens often blame themselves for the parents' conflicts and worry about issues that parents may not even think to talk to their children about such as family's finances, living in a new home, parents having new romantic partners.

Divorce/Separation is hard on everyone involved in the family but there are ways to help your teens. By being open with your teens about what is going on in the family without talking negatively about the other parent and answering your teen's questions openly and honestly, it will help your child feel less anxious and confused about the changes taking places. This can be a challenging time and it is important when to know to ask for professional help:


When to ask for help:
  • When co-parents cannot agree on parenting decisions
  • When the child is reluctant to visit a parent
  • When step-family issues are having a negative impact on parenting
  • When there is ongoing high conflict between parents regarding the children
  • When parents need help with parenting 


Remember that listening to your children and putting them above any conflict that you are having with your child's parent is the most important lesson to learn to help your family through this difficult time.  

Helpful Resources:




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